D-Day!

Today is Caius' due date!

And I feel like I do any other day... tired, beaten and bruised, heavy, crabby, and ready to have him here.

I sincerely doubt today is the day he will come. I've had people remind me that tonight is a full moon and that he will likely be born today... I doubt it. Unless things start to pick up and progress within the next few hours (which they very well could..) I don't think today is going to be the day Caius joins us.

Doctor appointment on Thursday afternoon was a bit of a let-down... no progress from the previous week. Still 2.5cm dilated and 50% effaced. He didn't offer to do a membrane sweep or anything either... sad :(

Oh well. I guess he wants to be an October baby... Alex, Landon and I are going to the Nascar Speed Park today so they can do go kart racing, bumper boats, laser tag, rock wall climbing, video games, etc and I will watch from the sidelines... BUT the good news is the amount of walking and stair climbing I will be doing should either A) help encourage Caius out or B) convince me that nothing will force him out except medical intervention....

40 weeks and counting.... you have officially worn out your welcome Caius! Please vacate the premises!

Manic grumbling and sighing...

Still here, still pregnant... and miserable. Miserable because my body cannot handle this much longer (and yes, I know it won't have to... ALL babies are born EVENTUALLY), and miserable because I just want Caius here already. I'm tired of waiting, & I know Alex and Landon are both extremely anxious. It's very difficult to explain to a four year old who has little grasp on the aspect of time that his brother has no specific set "date" for when he's coming, it's just whenever he feels like it... that explanation does not compute in his ever-expanding head full of knowledge.

I also enjoy getting texts and calls from friends/family asking how I am doing every day, but I always feel so guilty to not have any kind of exciting news to share with them... I know it's not true, but it just feels like I let EVERYBODY down on a daily basis when he's not here =( I still have hope that he will be a few days early, but I think I'm done guessing an actual date.

By the time bedtime rolls around every night, I have steady contractions and pains and part of my mucus plug comes out every night.... and I go to bed thinking "I need to sleep if this is early labor, and maybe I will be woken up in full-blown labor in the middle of the night." .................Nope. My body pretty much resets itself when I'm sleeping. I wake up feeling fine. Every day I feel a little bit different than the days before which always makes me think, "Maybe today will be the day." Nope. I'm just crazy I think.

On a daily basis, I feel like a walking time bomb. Everybody is on edge around me and ready to jump when the time comes, which is great to know we are surrounded by so many helpful and willing people. But unfortunately, unless my water breaks or I have a giant amount of bloody mucus plug come out (gross, I know) there's really no reason people should think I am going to immediately go into intense active labor right away, lol. There are days where I believe my water WILL break actually.... I feel like an overly-filled water balloon and when I walk during this time, I expect to feel a "pop" and get soaking wet. Don't get me wrong: it leaks at least once a day, but nothing noteworthy.

Aside from all of the "fun" uncertainty of every day, I am very happy to announce that I am officially done with work until November! That, above all things, has made me SOOOOO happy and relaxed. The stresses of work and being a whale were really NOT a good combination to have in my life. We were able to figure out a way to afford me being on leave longer, so I decided to take the opportunity and take advantage of it. Time is all mine now (mind and Landon's, rather...) until Caius gets here. It's such a nice feeling....

Exciting week!

Tomorrow is 39 weeks! Wednesday the 19th, I had my Doctor appointment and he FINALLY checked me! I was expecting some kind of progress towards labor (as I had several PAINFUL and intense contractions off and on the week before) and was surprised when he told me I was at 2.5, almost 3 centimeters dilated and a little over 50% effaced!! I was taken aback... that was greater news than I had thought! With Landon, I was not effaced at ALL and never dilated naturally beyond 1cm and had absolutely no certain contractions or signs of impending labor (except that I was as big as a whale!)

Of course, now that I know where I'm at, I am hoping any day now will be his birthday! With my luck, he will still be an October baby... lol!! Alex has been SO adorable every morning, hoping just as much as I am that any given day will be Caius' birthday... his family and my family alike are texting me left and right asking if anything exciting is happening.... it's almost surreal to think I could be hours away from having him here with us!

Yesterday was my mother-in-law's birthday (the 20th), and we were all hoping that he would come then. Obviously, he did not... but it would have been special since Landon shares his birthday with my mom, so we figured Caius sharing his birthday with Alex's mom would be pretty cool too! Oh well... =(

*Caution: TMI Alert!!* Last night, I actually lost part of my mucus plug and it had blood in it!! It's the most amount of blood I've seen since December of last year when I had my last period, LOL!! Most people go into labor a few hours, days or a week after losing their mucus plug... I don't think I lost enough to be anticipating that, but it was still quite exhilarating for me to have some more proof of impending labor!!

My biggest wish for this pregnancy (other than having a healthy baby, healthy pregnancy, and not gaining a whole lot) was that I would go into labor naturally and before October. I have such high hopes that this will still happen! Even if I am late and go into October (which I really don't want to do, but he will come when he's ready), I am still so excited and hopeful that labor will happen on it's own and I will not have to be induced. I really don't feel like I have more than a few days left (if that) but you never know... it could be wishful thinking!

Tomorrow is my final day of work and I couldn't be happier about it. I was so determined to stay at work until 40 weeks or until he came, but was given the opportunity to go a little bit earlier. I took the opportunity and am SO thankful I decided to do so! I can hardly wait to be home for around 7-8 weeks =)

Full term

As of Saturday, I am *officially* full term and Caius is free and clear to come whenever he would like. SO EXCITING!! So, obviously me being the overly-anxious person I am, I am analyzing and praying every false contraction I have will eventually turn into true labor. I do my best to not think about it (after all, it will happen when it's meant to happen, and NOTHING I do will change that fact) but it's so hard.

I decided yesterday I was OFFICIALLY DONE being pregnant with this little guy. I'm over it... I don't want to sound ungrateful, because I know how much others struggle to be in the position I am in, but I want to be honest on my own blog. I'm sure in a few years I will miss his kicks and how easy it was when it was just Landon we had to worry about and Caius was safe in my belly... but in the meantime, I'm anxious to meet him and have our family of four together, I'm anxious to start my maternity leave and be home with my boys and have my mom come visit at the end of my leave, and I'm SO ready to have my body back (breathing normal, sleeping however I want to, be able to keep up with Landon and the housework)..... I just want him here.

Nothing too terribly exciting to report. Most things are the same, but there are a few differences... still mild nausea every few weeks, mild heartburn on occasion (once every few days), and my eating changes daily. Some days I am insatiable, and other days I have to remember to eat a few snacks here and there. A *new* symptom I've acquired over the last 3 days is swollen feet... not just swollen, but PAINFUL as well. It's completely tolerable but still stinks to have one more "inconvenience"... I am VERY thankful though since this pregnancy could be going a hell of a lot worse than what it has been. My weight gain is pretty steady. I had an appointment yesterday morning and had gained 3lbs in one week (average) but the doctor was happy because I haven't gained anything for 4 weeks prior. My total weight gain thus far is 20lbs. I am quite happy with that number!

I really wanted my doctor to check me at my appointment yesterday. A few days prior, I had had some pretty intense and seemingly regular contractions so I was hoping he could tell me if they had done anything for my progression. He didn't want to "disappoint" me but promised he would check next week at my appointment. I have hope that he will have *some* kind of news to tell me next week, but I'm also preparing myself to hear him tell me that there's no progress. I know it doesn't mean anything when it comes to babies, because ANYTHING can happen at any time when it comes to true labor, which can occur at any time and of it's own accord. Sixteen days until his due date!!!

Come on out Caius!! It's time to meet your family and be here with us forever. I can't wait to kiss and love your beautiful little face!