(I suck so bad at actually updating this blog... hopefully that changes now!)
So the tests I posted a week or so ago were all false. Or I had a chemical pregnancy. Either way, no baby from them. I was absolutely heartbroken... I don't know how some girls go through cycle after cycle of miscarriages and still be in one piece seemingly. Thinking I had miscarried and feeling the cramping coming on.... knowing I just missed out on a whole life.... knowing my body had killed my baby.... it was terrible to say the least.
But God has a plan... through all things good or bad, He has a plan. And boy, did he surprise me!!
After about a week of negatives on my cheap internet strips, I was about to throw in the towel and just pray that Aunt Flow came for her visit so I could move on. The morning of the 17th I went ahead and took another cheapie test... dipped it and took my shower. about 10 minutes later when I emerged from said shower, there it was: a bright pink second line staring back up at me. I was completely skeptical because I hadn't gotten a line on these before (nothing false... faint shadows but nothing definite), and so I was beginning to wonder if these crappy tests were completely bogus as well. (Just as an FYI, I know it's hard to see in this pic... it's there. These tests are impossibly thing so it's hard to know what you are looking at sometimes.)
So, onward I went to work, getting another good hold going... but I made a pit-stop at Walmart first... I bought a few blue dye cheapies (the kind that gave me my false positive back in July) and a box of Answer brand. I parked at my store and pulled out a blue dye and promised myself I would only look at it for up to 10 minutes after taking it. There was NO WAY I wanted to see a false positive again. So before clocking on I went and took the test. I shoved it in my pocket and clocked on. About 3 minutes after taking it, I pulled it out of my pocket .... big fat positive. No question about it.... positive. (again, hard to see in this pic... it's there.)
I began wondering if I really was on to something, or had just completely lost my mind. There's no way I could be pregnant TWICE in a cycle. (I still think those other tests I took a while ago were just false/evaps.) I was angry that I didn't grab an Answer to test with at this point... although I knew I didn't want to waste another expensive test if it was nothing. About 2.5 hours later I had another hold going and ran to my car and grabbed an Answer test. Took it in the bathroom at work.. it took a little longer than my other tests but that second pink line came peeking through... I was dumbfounded. Could it really be true???
I text the picture to a friend and asked if she could see it.... instantly replied with a yes. I showed a co-worker at work whom I am closer to and she said she could easily see it. I was tearing up and in denial. No way could this day be real!
These pee sticks above are a collection of four sticks I did in the course of four mornings... each one getting darker. I still am having a hard time grasping it... we are FINALLY pregnant again!!! I showed Alex and he is just as thrilled. Still skeptical of being in a dream, I decided to take my digi. It came up "pregnant" within about 90 seconds. I have NEVER had a digital test come back with a positive result. (Alex also jokingly told me the lines were hard to see in the pictures I sent him, so I took this and showed him the next morning and said "Well, the lines are faint and hard to see, but can you READ?"... He thought it was funny.) My heart was all a-flutter and I am could not express how happy I am.
Guessing at my ovulation, I would be due around September 30th. I have a Dr Appt on Feb 1 to go and confirm said details. Wouldn't it be wonderful to get an ultrasound??? Doubtful....
We are still waiting to tell family/friends until we confirm this pregnancy with a heartbeat and/or an U/S. I don't feel like anything negative will come of this pregnancy, but I wanted to tell others how we see fit as opposed to last time when it got blabbed to everybody and there was no element of excitement for us.
I'm so excited to know that all of this work we did to conceive paid off and we finally have our miracle baby #2 coming in September!!
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